


The Pale Knight

by Doxilline_Alien



Category: Hollow Knight (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, everyone besides quirrel and lemm are like briefly mentioned, i am a nervous bean and i dont know how writing works, i will update soon i promise dear god help me, im gay and these bugs are and ill die on that hill, its an AU, its kinda short but im working on it okay, tags and ratings will update as i write, the radiance is a bitch
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-08-21 00:01:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20236540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doxilline_Alien/pseuds/Doxilline_Alien
Summary: A knight meets a recently moved in ruby shelled bug. And god does that shell stick in his head.





	1. Ruby Shell

Quirrel was one of the more common bug guards, those who were front line to make sure the kingsmoulds weren't going to have any problems with the crowds of bugs.  
Why were they walking through the city of tears?  
Who knows.  
The king wanted to visit the city for some reason.  
They led the kingsmoulds, and the carriage to the center grounds.  
The center of Hollownest…

Quirrel faced the empty platform where a statue would go.

Another tribute to the king perhaps?

He glanced around at the crowd around him.  
Common bugs, noble bugs, Singers, workers, traveling merchants…  
And a bug he didn't know. 

Quirrel was a common guard, who was stationed at the city of tears for when the king would visit.  
An elite guard that all the sentries wished they could be.  
Because of this, people talked to him, and They tried to become friends with him- he didn't call them friends, but he remembered the biggest majority of them.

But this bug... He was new.  
Quirrel didn’t stare too long, but just long enough to remember what the bug looked like.  
A short beard, a long twisting horn, a ruby shell.

He gazed over then went to his knees and bowed as the Pale King stepped out of his carriage. The crowds around him bowed as well. 

The king was there to give his blessing to the statue going up, however, Quirrel saw many of the King's children follow him out.  
The strange children, with dark eyes, and no voices.  
The king had a name for all of them. So did the white lady.

They called them Vessels. The biggest one, besides the princess, was called Hollow.  
The princess was Hornet, however she was a true bug.  
A strange love child between the king and the queen of deepnest. A peace treaty of some kind. 

Quirrel watched as the Wyrm placed his radiant hand against the plaque, and nodded his head.

The city cheered.

Another tribute.

...

A week had passed since the king was in the city. 

The statue’s construction occurred almost at once, and Quirrel was partially forced to stare as they build the king, the white lady and their children into the center of his city. 

He found himself trying to find that mysterious bug.  
A ruby shell. A short beard. A twisting horn.

A Lot of the bugs in the city of tears fit Ruby shell and twisting horns, but only this one had a beard growing under his mask.

He kept his patrol around the statue. He chatted with a couple bugs as he marched about.  
He heard an off comment along the lines of "Is this statue really necessary?"

Of which he turned and looked at the bug who said it. The ruby shelled bearded bug. 

"Infact yes, it's being made as a tribute to the King and his family."  
The bug looked at him. "I didn’t ask you."

He scoffed. The bug looked up at the statue, and sighed.  
A couple bugs murmured about rudeness and walked away, and Quirrel took it as time to start his patrol again. The ruby shelled bug stood at the statue for a while.

At some point, they turned to him. "I'm Lemm. "  
" ... Quirrel. " He said back

"I just moved here, I buy relics in the 3rd district, second floor. " He nodded.  
"A Relic Seeker."  
"I guess that's a name for it."  
Quirrel settled into the silence of the rain on his hood. 

"I need to leave before I catch a cold. If you want, I can come back later." Lemm gazed at him.  
He shrugged. "It' s up to you. I can’t leave this patrol until another guard comes."

"I'll be back later." Lemm walked off into the streets, and Quirrel found himself watching to make sure he would be safe.


	2. Directions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A ruby shelled bug needs directions to an expensive bakery. Quirrel battles his inner dialog.

Quirrel’s patrol was nearly done for the day. His replacement, a young guard who just recently grew in her wings and was promoted to a stationary guard, was sitting nearby flirting with some ladies who had come to admire her shining armor. She was flashing about her big wings, rolling in the comments of beauty and strength.  
He rolled his eyes, and kept his patrol, gazing around. His eye caught a ruby shell, and he turned.  
Lemm was walking down the street, gazing at signs, mumbling to himself about “Twisting Cities.” His hand gripped an umbrella that shielded that ruby shell from the rain that beat down on his hood.  
Quirrel found himself wishing he could show him around. To keep him from getting lost of course.  
No other reason.

He looked at the other guard, who had stood from her spot, and fluttered over her little mob of women. She landed, and walked towards him, drawing her nail. He nodded to her, and she bowed her head. A goodbye gesture for the higher knight.  
“Have fun.” She snorted.  
“Good luck flying around in a circle. I heard it’s quite hard for you newbies,” He laughed and nudged her, “I wouldn’t know, being a waterbug n’ all.”  
She scoffed, “Oh bug off Quirrel.” She nudged him back.  
He snickered, and started to make his way towards his house.  
Conveniently… He had to pass by the wandering Lemm to get there. He tucked his nail away against his shell, and kept walking, trying hard to not think about how he was walking as he passed Lemm, and harder about what he should eat for dinner.  
Maybe… he could use that weird tik tik meat he got on sale for a stew.  
Or, he could make that roasted fish dish his mother used to make him before he left to work the archives and became a guard.  
Maybe.

Quirrel took a deep breath, and closed his eyes, just listening to the rain.  
He was tapped on the shell of his armor, making a harsh tinging noise.  
“Hey. Pale Knight. I need your help.”  
Quirrel opened his eyes, and turned, ready to be annoyed.  
He sucked in a breath to begin to snap-  
Until he registered it was Lemm. His anger subsided almost immediately 

“My name is Quirrel.”  
“Quirrel, or whatever your name is. I need help finding the bakery. I can’t make sense of any of the maps here.”  
He chuckled to himself, quietly, but enough that lemm heard it and frowned. “What’s the occasion? The bakery is pretty expensive, considering it’s in the high district.”  
“That’s where it is?” Lemm huffed, and crossed his arms in a little pout, that Quirrel had to squash the influx of thoughts about it being adorable, and replace them with Very Normal Not At All About This Bug thoughts.  
“I was hoping to try the sticky buns.”  
Quirrel nodded. Yes. That’s something to think about.  
“I’ve tried them a couple times, they’re worth the geo.” He nodded. 

Lemm sighed, adjusting the umbrella in his hand. “Maybe I can get a client in soon enough and make more geo. Then I could try some of their cupcakes even.” 

Quirrel looked at him. “Good luck with that.”  
“Yeah, yeah. You’re probably on your way home, huh?”

He nodded, slowly. “Then I’m going to try and find an idea for dinner.”

Lemm tilted his head up a bit, and stared at him. “You have fun with that. Visit my shop sometime, eh? You should know where it is.”

Quirrel turned his head towards the building. He rocked his head to the side for a moment, then nodded. “Maybe. Have a good day, Relic Seeker Lemm.”

“Don’t get yourself killed, Pale Knight Quirrel,” Lemm started to turn to leave. “You better show up.”  
He watched him walk away for a moment, then chuckled to himself. He started his way home...  
Quirrel made a mental note…  
Find his stash of geo in the house. Count what he had.  
Then, before work tomorrow, stop by the bakery. See if they have any sticky buns out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapters i will be working on to make longer, so you only have to deal with my inability to use words for a short time.


	3. Secret Admirer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quirrel feels a deep pang in his shell. What could this be?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no self control therefore here's another chapter

Quirrel shelled out nearly a thousand geo for a batch of 6 sticky buns.  
He stopped by the bakery before his shift, which such times did not make the employee happy. He had to be down as his station at what others bugs called “The Asscrack of Dawn”, or many hours before any shop was open, excluding the higher end shops that served the horrible schedules of the higher caste.  
He made his way towards the building holding the relic shop. Quirrel was sure Lemm wouldn’t be awake, so he would be fine to drop off something for a… friend. Yes. He ducked inside, and pulled off his hood to gaze around. The only others currently up at this time was there other, lower guards who patrolled the city, and the other bugs with such jobs that would have them up at such an early time. Quirrel stepped into an elevator with a couple other bugs, who seemed to be quite surprised to see a pale knight in the building. He mentally cursed himself for being in armor when he did this, but what can he do now?  
Eventually, He found the little relic shop, tucked away in the tower. He took the box from his shell, and peaked inside the shop.  
After confirming the Relic Seeker was in fact, not within the shop, or at least not visible to him currently, Quirrel set the box on the counter. He then pulled a small note from his shell, read it over to make sure Monomon didn’t fail him in his writing classes, and placed it down on the box. 

Then, after turning and peaking out, He stepped into the hallway. A young child, up for wyrm knows what reason, saw him and gasped. He put a finger to his mask, and winked. She giggled and put her little hands over her mask. Quirrel turned, and made his way back into the elevator. All without anyone knowing his true intention…  
He stepped into the center circle, and glanced over at the guard he would replace during his shift. A tiny bug, who Quirrel came to know as Sly, was very happy to be let off his shift. Quirrel heard him grumble about “The boys waking up soon…” as he walked away.  
Kids. How difficult when you’re a knight. Perhaps he should see to visit Sly and his young ones.  
He giggled to himself. How tiny would the children be with a bug as small as Sly?

Quirrel rolled with the thought as he began his patrol. However… His thoughts quickly went into counting his steps. Count the time, count the steps.  
He kept his patrol in order, counting his steps as he went. 20 steps, turn, 20 steps back, march to the other side, and do the same.

He glanced over to see a couple kids who pretended to be like him, marching, holding a stick. A little kid came running over with a fake crown made of paper and stones, ignoring the fact that the rain was causing it to slowly break down. Quirrel decided to play a bit, and he turned and bowed to the small bug. “Oh! My king- What brings you back to the City so soon?”  
The child laughed, then stood up tall. “It’s time to do your salute!”  
He stood, and took his nail, doing a much more simplified version of the royal pale knight salute.  
The children cheered and shrieked with joy, then ran off laughing and playing. Quirrel chuckled and stood. He watched them for a moment, then turned and continued his patrol.

Quirrel sort of zoned out as he went through the day, marching, counting, watching workers sculpt out the king’s statue. Until Lemm tapped his shoulder.  
“Huh- Oh, yes?” He looked at him.  
“Someone bought me a whole thing of sticky buns and I can’t possibly eat them all myself. You’re the only other bug I know on any other level than business, so I’m asking you if you want to come over and share them later.”  
Quirrel blinked, then tilted his head as if he was thinking, trying to pretend the answer didn’t immediately pop into his head. “I guess I could pop in after my patrol. Would you like me to bring anything?”  
Lemm shrugged. “Whatever you want. Maybe we can turn it into a dinner date!” He laughed jokingly. Quirrel had to make sure his face was hidden by his hood, because it burned meaning his face was most-likely red. He forced himself to laugh with Lemm.  
“Just don’t forget it! You know where my shop is; My house is connected to it in the back. Don’t be late!”

Quirrel nodded as Lemm turned and walked away. He watched him as he walked, then let the breath he suddenly realized he had been holding go.  
His replacement guard for the next shift, Avari as he learned, was staring at him, holding back laughter. “You are so lovestruck it’s pathetic.” She mocked him.  
He growled and turned to her.  
Her wings carried her much higher than he could reach, but not higher than he could vault a nail…  
No. No, bad Quirrel. You cannot attack a coworker for laughing at you being a dumbass.  
She cackled as she buzzed over, landing in front of him. She towered over him heightwise  
“Shush.” He snapped. He gripped the nail at his side. She glanced at his hand, then back at him.  
“I’ll make you a deal, Don’t try to kill me, and I’ll take the shift early so you can get to your date.” His face burned more, and he pulled his hood around his face to hide the bright red glow.  
She pat his back, giggling. “You get home and get fancy.”  
He spun on his heel and started to walk fast.  
Avari waved at him, laughing. “Have Fun Quirrely!”

He marched back home faster than he had in a long time.


	4. Lumaflies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A date... A ruby shell... Such bright Lumaflies...

Quirrel gripped the gift close to his shell. A bottle of some kind of fancy sparkling wine, wrapped with a king’s idol in the center of the bow. That would impress Lemm, right? It wasn’t any big thing or a relic of some kind, but hopefully, it would.   
He found himself asking that over and over in his head as he walked from his house. His blue shell was cold, exposed to the rain for the first time in a while, missing the glimmering white armor that kept him fairly dry. Quirrel passed by the statue and waved at Avari.   
The mantis snickered and made kissy noises at him, waving her wings towards him to blow away his hood. Quirrel put a hand on the top of his head and scowled at her.   
He turned to the building and kept walking.  
It was only a quick walk to get to Lemm’s building… But his anxiety made it feel like forever.   
He stepped past a large puddle and glanced up into the windows of the building. He nearly dropped the bottle, startled to see Lemm staring out of one on the 2nd floor. Of course, he would be looking out, he had one of the largest windowed sections of the floor.   
Quirrel gathered his thoughts and quickly got into the building, and out of the rain. 

He then leaned against the wall and took as deep of a breath as he could.  
“Great wyrm… I’m gonna make a huge fool of myself…” He slid down the wall and sat on the floor. “He must’ve been joking. This isn’t a date, I’m making a fool of myself.” He drew a hand down the front of his mask.  
“But I can’t just.. Ditch him.” Quirrel sighed.   
Plus a few bugs had walked past and given him weird looks. 

Time to get to Lemm.   
Quirrel pushed himself to his feet and walked down to the elevator. He gripped the bottle in his fist as he flicked the lever, and started up. It was him, his thoughts and the metal of the elevator.   
It was an abrupt stop, but one he was used to. He took a step out of the elevator and gazed around carefully. A force of habit for a knight.   
A deep breath. He kept forward and continued to the shop. He was here only a handful of hours ago, but it was still anxiety-inducing.

He stared at the door. He took a deep breath, then forced his hand to lift and knock.   
Quirrel stepped back and waited. It was only a few seconds, but it felt like it was forever, and his face was getting warmer and warmer as he panicked more and more. 

Lemm opened the door. “Ah! Quirrel! Hello hello!” Quirrel waved with a small chuckle. “I showed up!” He held up the bottle. “I brought refreshments.”  
Lemm chuckled, then stepped to the side to let him. Quirrel felt warmth in his shell as he stepped into the bright shop.   
He gazed around and looked to Lemm as he stepped in and closed the door. “You have quite the impressive collection. And they all look in wonderful condition.”   
Lemm nodded, walking over and patting Quirrel on the shoulder. Quirrel’s shell lit up in shocking lumaflies at the touch, and he quickly had to come up for reasons why his face might be so red. “I have a local supplier. They bring in relics, I buy them and record what history might be contained and contain them here, then they come for the information,” He chuckled a bit. “They bring in some perfectly preserved ones and I have no choice but to assume they’re some sort of time traveler!” Lemm burst into laughter. A deep, genuine noise that rose Quirrel’s heart to pounding and warmth flooded forth. He laughed with Lemm, gently setting the bottle on the counter.   
Lemm walked past him, still chuckling. “But, you’re here for other things. We can sit in my living room for the time being.” He opened a secondary door in the back of the shop and gestured for Quirrel. He nodded and stepped past the ruby shelled bug, into the house portion of Lemm’s abode.   
He gazed around. It was fairly fancy, not as much as upper-caste households, but a lot more stylized than a normal home within the lower caste of the city. He could smell the sticky buns from the morning.   
“I hope you don’t mind that I already started to eat them.” Lemm chuckled. “I couldn’t resist myself when I found them in my shop this morning!”   
“I don’t blame you.” Quirrel chuckled softly. “They’re quite lovely. I can rarely pay for them, considering the price, but they’re wonderful when you treat yourself.” He tilted his head at him. 

Lemm grunted, sitting at one of the chairs about a coffee table. “Well I hope whoever bought them doesn’t mind I’m sharing them.” He gestured to the small, mostly unused couch across from him. Quirrel took a moment to sit and set the bottle down.   
“I’m sure they don’t.” He shrugged.   
Lemm gently pushed the box on the table towards Quirrel. “Here, you can take your pick.”  
Quirrel nodded to him. “Thank you.” Hoping his hand wasn’t shaking as badly as it seemed, Quirrel opened the box and selected a bun. 

Lemm started talking as Quirrel ate the bun.   
“So, I know my work isn’t as fun as your little pale knight job-”  
Quirrel chimed in.“I worked as an archivist a few years ago, I actually enjoy learning history from relics.” He looked at the bun in his hand. “Being a knight isn’t actually that fun, you just walk around.”  
Lemm chuckled, and Quirrel felt that glow in his shell. “Well, that must suck in this city. But, my job is just... Relic Keeper. I call myself a relic seeker, but really I just pay people for old relics and stuff and they come back for the info and pay me back for it.” He sighed. Quirrel looked up at him.   
Lemm took a bun and chewed on it. Quirrel savored the moment for just a second. A honey drizzled bun, with nuts and cinnamon, and sitting across from this ruby shelled bug, on what was jokingly called a date.   
He cleared his throat, making Lemm looked over. “So.. What has your latest study shown you? Or is that confidential?”   
Lemm shrugged. “It was a diary of an ancient bug from another kingdom. I’m halfway through translating it.”  
Quirrel’s eyes sparkled. “Where? I’ve always wanted to explore other places in the world! But of course, I’d have to get out of being a guard.”   
“A place called Pharloom. Haven’t learned much else.” He laughed. Quirrel still buzzed with excitement.   
“Now, Mister knight, I want to know what you’ve done.” He pointed to him. Panic and warmth flooded his shell again.   
“Oh, Uhh..” He scratched at his mask. “Well. Back when I was younger, I worked in Fog Canyon with Monomon in her archives. All I really did was take notes when I traveled anywhere and gave them to her. I guess I owed her since she did teach me to read and write.” He chuckled a bit, then stopped when Lemm just tilted his head at him. “Erm... I’ve only ever patrolled around the city, Fog Canyon and the White Palace when I was first recruited. I could show you the places around the city-” Quirrel nearly lept out of his shell as Lemm stood up fast.   
“Yes. Let’s take a walk in the city, yes? You can show me where you’ve patrolled, and tell me about them! It’ll be a great way to figure out this city!” Lemm put his hands on his hips and stared down at Quirrel, who was still trying to make sure his shell, was in fact, still on his body.   
After a moment, he swallowed his anxiety and nodded to Lemm.  
The ruby shelled bug chuckled, then nodded back. “Let’s go!” He marched to the door, and waited, umbrella in hand.  
Quirrel stood, managing to hide his anxious, shaking hands by dusting himself off. He took a deep breath, then stepped after Lemm.   
Following behind the other, they settled into an uncomfortable silence.   
“Got any funny stories from work?” Lemm looked over at him.   
Quirrel blinked, then looked at him. “Um… Back when I patrolled the castle grounds, I once saw the King eat dirt after he tripped.”   
He heard Lemm snort. “Serves him right. The King is some weird, overly talked about bug. I could care less about him. This history of this kingdom interests me more.”   
Quirrel couldn’t help but snort and giggle to himself, thinking over the story. “He made the queen mad and she kicked him out into the castle grounds.”   
Lemm snorted. They stepped into the elevator and flicked the lever to go down. 

By the time they stepped out of the elevator, they were laughing and tumbling over themselves.  
“And-” Quirrel wheezed and pat Lemm on the shell. “And after that, he went FLYING down the stairs and completely wiped out on the street!”   
Lemm laughed, leading into wheezing and fighting to breathe through his laughter. Quirrel chuckled and gently pat his shell to help. Eventually, he caught his breath and shook his head.   
“That king is something. I’m not even from this kingdom, and yet other bugs tell me to worship him like some god.”  
Quirrel shrugged. “I’ve always lived here, and I don’t even do that. Now! Onto the tour.”  
“Yes.” Lemm nodded. “Lead the way, gallant knight!” Lemm bowed in a way and gestured forward. Quirrel chuckled and blushed ever so slightly. 

They began walking into the rainy city. Lemm held the umbrella over their heads. Quirrel led him to the statue in the square.   
“Obviously I patrol here at this point in time.” He looked up at the statue, then over to Avari. Of course, she was talking with any woman she could put into a conversation. He scoffed and shook his head. Lemm looked over.   
“Who is she?”  
“A junior knight. She’s a young mantis, who quite frankly gets under my shell. I’ve worked with her for about 2 years now.” Quirrel crossed his arms. “But we’re heading to the Soul Sanctum and the Watcher’s Spire.”   
Lemm turned to him and blinked. “You guarded in the Soul Sanctum?”  
Quirrel rubbed at the base of his shell where it met his head. “Ehh... I was more like a babysitter. I watched the King’s children when they went in for soul training. The Soul Master paid me to just … Watch them. And a lot of times they just… watched back.” He shivered. Lemm chuckled a bit. Quirrel felt warm again.   
They walked towards the upper caste section of the city, making small talk here and there.   
Quirrel stopped them before they stepped into the elevator. “Oh! Oh yeah, I can show you the new patrol I’ll be taking soon!”  
Lemm looked up at him with a confused look that made a pull in his heart. “You’re switching to a new patrol?”  
Quirrel nodded, then pointed. “Just down there. The King’s station.”  
Lemm followed where he pointed, then sighed... quite sadly. “Oh…”   
His heart panged. “But, once it’s fully built, it’ll be open to the public! And the stags will be running for the public, not just for shipments of goods.”  
Lemm looked up at him, then chuckled. “I’ll make sure to visit you then.”   
Quirrel looked out towards the station once again, toiling in his mind. This feeling Lemm brought him…  
It was love, wasn’t it? He loved this bug. 

BUT HE’LL NEVER LOVE YOU BACK.

Quirrel blinked, and looked at Lemm. “Did you say something?”   
The bearded bug shook his head. “Nope. Why?”  
“I must be hearing things...” He pressed a hand to his eye. “Maybe it’s a lack of sleep.” He chuckled.   
Lemm chuckled with him. 

THAT BUG WILL NEVER LOVE YOU LIKE YOU LOVE HIM

He ignored the voice. It could’ve just been anxiety, or something. Just ignore it and it’ll go away. 

JOIN MY LIGHT, AND YOU WILL FIND LOVE.  
Ignore it. It’ll go away. Lemm was tugging his arm to go. When did they lock arms? When did they start to move?

QUIRREL, THE PALE KNIGHT. JOIN MY LIGHT, AND ACCEPT THE RADIANT LOVE I CAN GIVE YOU.

His stomach churned. He got the heavy urge to throw up.   
“Quirrel?” He finally heard Lemm’s concerned voice. “Are you okay?”  
Quirrel blinked, then looked down at Lemm. “Ah.. Yes. Shall we continue?”

His hazy mind blurred out most of the small talk. They walked to the entrance of the watcher’s tower, with many of the upper-caste in awe of a pale knight, locked in arms with a common bug, most of their faces unrecognizable to Quirrel thinking back. He felt like he was getting worse.   
Lemm kept glancing at him, worried.  
It was after they were walking back that Quirrel fully felt how sick he was. He was starting to get woozy, and Lemm completely noticed it.   
“Quirrel… Do you need to go home? You look like you’re going to be sick…” Lemm touched his arm. Quirrel jumped at the touch and looked at him.   
“H-huh? Oh, no no…” He shook his head slowly. “I’ll… Be fine. We can head back to your house and hang out.” He forced himself to chuckle.   
Lemm frowned at him worriedly, then sighed. “Alright.”

They continued back to Lemm’s home, where Quirrel was at his worst. Lemm managed to get him to sit down.   
… The house was quiet. Lemm, watching Quirrel hazily try to figure out his surroundings. 

“I.. Should go..” Quirrel groaned, forcing himself to stand. “I don’t.. Want to be a bother.” He chuckled in a painful way.   
“You really should just sit and rest.” Lemm stood, and gently took Quirrel’s arm, to keep him from falling as he leaned forward.   
“I’ll… I’ll be okay..” Quirrel laid a hand over Lemm’s, and stared with the hazy… faint orange gaze. Lemm only looked more worried.   
“Then let me at least help you home. You look deathly.” He tilted his head.  
Quirrel quickly shook his head, then pushed past Lemm. “I am a knight… I’ll be okay.”

Lemm stepped back, then sighed. “Alright. Stay safe, please.” 

Quirrel half stumbled out the door. He felt warm. But more like he was boiling in his shell. The lumaflies seemed too bright. The elevator, after he failed at least 3 times to hit the switch properly, was so loud. The violent scraping noise echoed in his head and bounced in his shell. It was unbearable. It burned so brightly within his mind.   
Love him. Love no one. Love… in the light…   
Quirrel stepped out into the rain, almost unable to feel the cold rain against the searing heat. He tried to breathe. The violent fire, the light, the loneliness spread further inside his shell. He kept walking. Kept thinking. Kept living.   
“I…” He started to tell himself. “I need…” to get home. The sentence tried to pry out. But, his body gave up. His legs felt like they shattered under him, and his body went crashing down. 

Quirrel laid, unconscious, on the streets within the rain. A ruby shelled bug rushed to grab an umbrella, moving from the window he had watched from. 

A new sickness bled its way into the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I gotta thank my partial co-writer and editor Star and the fact she dealt with me while I bugged around with this chapter.


	5. Tension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A deep pulse in the shell and a distant yearn for one's touch...

The lumaflies still seemed too bright.   
But, Quirrel was getting better.   
He had been moved to the station within the few days after his collapse, as the commander decided it would be best for him to not move around as much while he recovered.   
All he had to do was stand there, and stare. Watch the menders and builders, protect them incase… who knows. Nothing happened anyway.   
All Quirrel did during his shifts was think…  
Try to remember what happened…

The date was a haze of orange after they had left Lemm’s house. He remembered the rain… Lemm’s touch… Then the voice. The echo, that thinking back to it caused the boiling in his shell again.   
Quirrel never wanted to hear it again. However, he was unlucky as, after his accident, others began to have similar experiences. It made the haze rise in his thoughts. 

But, He concerned himself more with the next morning. Something had told him that it was wrong… He needed to wake up… He was… Late for work. He had thrown himself out of bed, ripped out of a haze of a dream, and bolted to get his armor ready for a late shift.   
However, It was after he landed on a hard floor and not his pillow stash, that he realized he was not in his house. A crack of the floor to his head was a quick wake up.   
A fast glance about told him… He was in the relic shop, and he had slept on one of Lemm’s couches. A second glance told him Lemm had been asleep in the chair across from him, still soaked from running to gather Quirrel in the streets. The warmth of knowing Lemm cared settled in...  
Or was that embarrassment that he had fallen asleep at Lemm’s house, with his memory fuzzy of what possibly happened the night before?  
He still felt warm, but it once again dawned on him that he was late. Quirrel had done a double-take, then bolted out and towards his house for his armor. 

Quirrel got chewed out by Sly and Avari when he showed up, with most of Sly’s complaints being “My kids are awake!” and “They’ll tear up the house!” Avari was just severely mad at him for forcing her to get ready for a shift so early before her normal one after she had given him a favor of letting him go home early.   
Lemm visited him later that day, while he marched about the statue. Quirrel’s heart panged, hearing the worry in Lemm’s voice as he asked if he was feeling any better, and hearing how close Lemm sounded to tears when Quirrel admitted he didn’t remember much.   
It hurt how much his heart yearned…   
He was only stationed there for another day before he was called in to see his Commander. That’s why he was in the King’s station now.   
Staring at a bug who was arguing over where a shipment of metal and material should go.

He sighed to himself and leaned on the wall next to him. He gazed around the station and huffed quietly.   
It was so… Boring. He didn’t even need to walk, and it just made him restless in his own shell.   
He tapped his feet, swung his arms, shook himself out, to hopefully rid himself of the pent up energy.   
The workers gazed at him curiously.   
He stopped when he smacked his hand into a wall and caused his whole arm to ring in pain. He heard snickering and giggles of the workers, then just resumed his normal stance. 

Back to watching the workers argue and buzz around.   
He sighed internally, curling his hand around the handle of his blade.   
It was gonna be a long day…

“Quirrel.” A sudden hand on his arm.  
For the 2nd time since he had known him, Lemm scared him nearly out of his shell. But this time, Quirrel shrieked, causing workers to startle and drop things. Quirrel shakingly leaned on the wall and slid to his knees, attempting to catch his breath, as workers scrambled to pick up what was dropped.   
“Sorry!” Lemm laughed quietly, offering a hand to help Quirrel up.   
He took his hand and pulled himself up with some help. Their hands linger together for a little too long…  
His shell buzzed with charged lumaflies, filling him with their electricity.   
Lemm dropped his hand and smiled. 

“How are you feeling? I haven’t been able to get in here to check on you.” Lemm chuckled, almost in a nervous way. Quirrel’s heart ached. He cared! Lemm cared about him- and that’s all his mind yelled for a good moment.   
“Oh, er... Better. Everything is a little too bright still.” He swore his face warmed up. Lemm got a worried look again.  
“Well… I’m glad you’re at least feeling better.” Lemm rubbed at the back of his head, seeming to try and play off the look.   
After a moment of silence, which consisted of Quirrel mentally screaming and Lemm dropping his hand with a sigh, Quirrel spoke up.   
“Is that all you showed up for? Broke into a construction site to ask me how I’m doing?” Quirrel jokingly got his serious guard look.   
Which just caused lemm to panic.   
“N-no of course not! I came to ask you other questions!” He said quickly. “I remembered you said you were stationed in the White Palace when you were first appointed.” 

Quirrel let the despair in his shell from freaking him out settled out before nodding.   
“Correct. It’s how they teach the new troops. Put them with the elite to learn.”   
“Do you think you could tell me about it?” Lemm tilted his head. 

Quirrel stared at him for half a second too long, thinking.   
“I could even take you there if you wanted. I can do anything to-” make you happy. He cut himself off.   
He cleared his throat, quickly trying to cover himself up. “I can do anything to answer your questions. With my accident the other day, I was gifted some extra days off.” 

Lemm stared at him. His expression was unreadable…  
Quirrel started to panic in his mind, a burning brightness creeping its way back into his shell.  
“If you took me to the palace I think I would die.” Lemm exhaled loudly, then laughed. His mask was tinted red- which hit Quirrel that He was blushing.   
“Well, I don’t want you to die!” Quirrel laughed. Lemm laughed with him.   
After a moment, Lemm looked at him and tilted his head.   
“Were… You being serious? About the trip?”  
Quirrel glanced out into the station, taking note of the arguing workers again, thinking…

“If you really wanted to go, I can pull a few strings.” He looked back down to Lemm. “I’m sure I could get my commander to approve a palace visit.”   
Lemm’s dark eyes sparkled. “Well, I would love to go with you! You could show me around!” A ruby shell bumped against the shining armor covering his own blue shell. A nudge of some sort.   
Quirrel buzzed internally, screaming and panicking. Outwardly, He just pat Lemm on the shoulder.   
A deep breath…  
“I’ll… pop over to your house after I ask my commander, alright? Then we can talk about what we can do while we’re there.” 

Lemm gave him a cheer, and… hugged Quirrel.   
He said something, maybe “Thank you” but Quirrel couldn’t hear him over the pound of his heart, and the buzzing in his shell.   
Quirrel nodded fast. Lemm pat his shell when he let go, said something then walked off.   
He just buzzed in his shell, leaning into the wall. For once, He couldn’t wait to talk to his commander.

Lemm had an extra hop in his step as he walked home. The rain pattered at his umbrella, held high over his head. He got looks from any sentry he passed by, but why would he care?  
Skipping, He walked passed the nearly completed statue, gazing up for a moment. Avari fluttered into view. 

“Ey old man, what’s got you so happy?” She landed to the side of him, nudging him with one of her claws. Lemm chuckled, leaning the umbrella on his shoulder to look at her.   
“Nothing, Avari. I’m just taking a stroll back to my house.” He shook his head. She leaned in close.   
“You went and saw Quirrel didn’t you?” The mantis tilted her head to give him a cocky look. Lemm scoffed. “Can’t a bug take a stroll about-” She continued to tilt her head at him. He sighed. “Yes, I did.”  
Avari laughed and nudged his ruby shell. “I knew it! You can’t keep yourself away from him!”   
“Don’t blame me! Blame him for being so handsome!” With a grumble, he added; “Plus, I wanted to make sure he was okay after he got so sick…” 

Avari continued, attempting to frazzle Lemm. “Tell me, what did you and your gallant pale knight do together?”  
Lemm’s face became visibly red from such a phrase. He gently punched her shoulder. “I’ll have you know he said he would bring me to the White Palace!”   
She gasped. “Ohhh how fancy! A date in the palace!” She pat his shell.   
He shrugged. “I wouldn’t call it a date… I doubt he even likes me.”

Avari stared at him, then snorted and laughed. She threw herself to the ground, cackling.  
Lemm looked away, trying to hide his burning face. She waved her claws at him, laughing.   
“Go get fancy for your knight!”   
He turned and started to sprint home. 

It was later in the afternoon, with the pouring rain beating down harder than before. Quirrel stared up at the building, unbothered by the rain hitting his blue shell. It was time to go see Lemm- with the news of their trip being accepted. A bag was held against his plated stomach.   
He felt… nervous. Like he was every time he stared up at this building. 

Quirrel took a deep breath and stepped into the building. He didn’t pause, or falter as he stepped into the elevator and hit the switch. After stepping past a few others, he found himself at Lemm’s shop. A deep warmth filled his shell… Gazing about the relics, imagining the stories to be found in them all. Wondering where they came from, and how they got here...  
He also wondered where Lemm was, leaving the shop wide open yet not being here. 

He hummed to himself, setting his bag next to the door and looking around. He gazed behind the counter, then in any of the little areas he thought Lemm could possibly hide in.   
Finally, Quirrel stepped behind the counter and knocked on the door, the one to Lemm’s living quarters.   
There was a bit of a crash, like a pot hitting a floor, then a loud curse. He blinked, feeling guilty. 

“Just a second!” The yell sounded mostly annoyed. It made his stomach churn as he stepped back around the counter. A few strides and He grabbed his bag, in time for Lemm to open the door.   
“Alright, alright. What do you-” He stopped, locking eyes with Quirrel. “Oh. I… didn’t expect to see you.”   
Quirrel chuckled nervously. “Uh… Sorry for randomly showing up. If you’re busy, I can leave, I just wanted to tell you that my commander approved for a trip.”   
“Already?” Lemm gasped. “I thought it would take a while!” 

Quirrel shook his head. “I was able to get in his office and ask right after my shift was over. Erm… He said that if we want to go before the grounds get crowded, we should probably go tomorrow.”  
Lemm perked up. “My! That’s great. Should I pack? How long will we be there?”   
“We will have about 3 days to visit.” Quirrel tilted his head. “A day to get out there, a day to hang out, then a day to get back. So pack what you need. I.. Have my stuff here.”   
He gestured to the bag on his shoulder.  
Lemm chuckled. “Well come set your stuff inside, You can stay here for the night so we can leave early.” 

Quirrel blushed. He didn’t expect it, but something told him he prepared for it anyway. He fought with himself with what to say. 

Eventually, he lost the battle of leaving, and nodded to Lemm.   
Lemm turned, and led him into the back rooms, and Quirrel found himself in Lemm’s home once again.

He set his bag down near the couch and gazed around. The smell of a stew was in the air, Quirrel must’ve interrupted his dinner. A deep haze settled in his stomach and he fiddled a little. Was he being rude? Annoying? Lemm must hate him, surely, for his continued ruining of things. Maybe he should-  
He was snapped out of the raising haze as Lemm touched his shoulder and gazed up at his face. “Do you want to eat? I was just about to have dinner.” His eyes smiled at him. “I have enough for two.”   
There was a deep ache in his heart. Quirrel nodded a bit. “If it’s no trouble..”  
“It’s no trouble at all!” Lemm hit his hand against Quirrel’s shell and laughed heartily. “It’ll be the first time in a long time I’ve had a friend over for dinner! Plus, you’re bringing me all the way to the castle! It’s the least I can do!”   
Quirrel shrugged. Lemm left the room, stepping into the kitchen.   
He watched Lemm for a moment before rounding the couch and sitting down, carefully. He closed his eyes…  
Listening to the rain on the window… The buzz of the lumaflies… Lemm humming softly to himself.   
Warmth filled him…   
He opened his eyes as he heard Lemm walk back. The ruby shelled bug held two bowls, and held one out for him to take.  
Quirrel took the bowl, feeling the warmth of the food sinking into his hands, and grabbing the spoon Lemm offered him.  
“Thanks, Lemm.” He looked at the bug as he stepped past Quirrel and sat next to him on the couch. There was a moment of silence as Quirrel took his first bite, with Lemm watching nervously. The warmth sank into his shell where his blush wasn’t already sitting. 

“Mmmm!” He looked at Lemm. “This is amazing!”   
Lemm’s mask turned a soft pink as he started eating as well.

Nothing much happened. Quirrel cleared his bowl, then mulled over the taste. Lemm stood and took his empty dish.  
They made eye contact for a second longer than they probably should have. Lemm cleared his throat, his mask becoming visibly pink once again. “Would you like a drink?”   
Quirrel thought for a moment, then nodded. “Sure, water would be nice.”   
Lemm got up and went towards the kitchen. Getting a drink wouldn’t be a big deal.  
The most it would be is handing off the glass without dropping it. 

Lemm worried he would drop the glass. He worried about a lot of things, like how should he maintain his posture around Quirrel. Or making sure his beard didn’t have anything stuck in it while Quirrel was here. Being around Quirrel.   
He didn’t want to make a fool of himself, in front of the bug of his dreams! Of course, it’s not like it would matter, Quirrel wouldn’t feel the same! He was a pale knight, and Lemm was merely a relic seeker.

Preoccupied and clearly stuck in his own head, Lemm managed to get drinks, and handoff Quirrel’s on the way back.   
Both were violently snapped to attention, however, when Lemm sat back down.   
Close enough that their shells touched, and arms pressed against each other. Lemm felt himself go a dark red. Quirrel refused to look over. He didn’t want to seem like a fool from how hot his face burned. 

Silence settled. Quiet, heart-thumping, mind racing silence…

Quirrel couldn’t settle the lumaflies in his shell. He forced himself to relax, and pretend this wasn’t causing his heart to pound so violently that his hands trembled, holding his glass.   
He took a deep breath. “So… uh… What would… What do you want to see in the White Palace? We have access to anywhere I can go.”   
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Lemm shift a bit away, removing the touch of their shells. He oddly yearned for it, however.   
“I… Honestly just want to see the Palace. To see the grounds and learn it’s history.”   
The cool feel of the glass in his hand starkly contrasted Quirrel’s entire shell. He ripped his mind away from his emotions. He had work to do. A bug to impress. An entire Palace to explore with a ruby shell next to him….

“I know where we could go. But I’ll keep it a secret.” He winked at Lemm.   
He heard Lemm huff, then pout. “That’s not fair! Tell me!”   
“No, it’ll be a secret!” He laughed. Lemm hit a fist against his shell playfully and huffed again.  
“Plus-” Quirrel looked down at the bug. “-you still need to pack for the trip.” 

Lemm stared at him blankly, processing this, then gasped. “True! I do need to do that!” He stood, and bolted off towards another room. 

Quirrel chuckled to himself… Something told him tonight was going to be a long night...

He was somewhat right. The night was long, and the darkness of the streets crept in..But nothing but warmth filled their shells. Quirrel argued with Lemm on why 7 notebooks were not needed in their trip to the palace, and Lemm snapped right back at him until they were laughing and telling stories.   
Lemm was packed, and they sat together on the couch once again, so close their shells brushed… But neither was bothered as they laughed and joked at each other.   
But Lemm was beginning to slow, and Quirrel struggled to keep his eyes open. 

Lemm’s shell was filled with nothing but warmth for this bug. He watched Quirrel yawn, then rub at his eyes.   
“Maybe I should hit the sack.” The sapphire waterbug chuckled. The glittering gem of his shell, with the soft light of the lumaflies… His dark gaze… It made Lemm’s breath catch in his throat…  
“Of course, I can get you a blanket-” Quirrel was already nodding off. 

He watched him nod slowly, yawn once more, then rest his head on his hands. “That would be wonderful…”   
Lemm sighed softly to himself, standing. He wandered back towards his bedroom, grabbing the softest blanket he had. 

Quirrel was swaying in his spot, on the verge of falling asleep. Lemm chuckled.  
“Tired?”  
“Mmm… just a little bit…”   
Lemm draped the blanket over Quirrel’s shoulders and snorted as Quirrel pulled it around him, then curled into it. He took a book from the coffee table and sat down next to Quirrel. 

Lemm took a deep breath, flipping to the last page he read- 

Then wordlessly, Quirrel flopped over, laying his head in Lemm’s lap. Lemm’s face became warmer than Quirrel’s shell against him.   
He stared down at the sleeping form of Quirrel, his mind racing. 

It settled on him marveling, gazing, thinking how his heart yearned for this bug…  
A quiet, gentle sleep fell upon him soon after… filled with warm shells, and the promise of tomorrow...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YALL THIS TOOK FOREVER I YEARN WITH THESE BUGS

**Author's Note:**

> I'm @paranormalmidnightparadox on tumblr and i dont know how to write


End file.
